Balmy
and hazy; a calming sort of day. I would like to throw out the to-do
list and hunker down behind a good book or take a long nap. But
things need doing and I've been marking them off at a little more
leisurely pace, one at a time. This day is unlike the last two days,
which have been hot, and it in no way resembles a week ago Sunday,
the day my girls and I decided to go to a nursery.
On
the hottest day of the season thus far, my girls and I decided to
meet for lunch and browse through a nursery. We didn't know it was
going to be so hot when we planned our outing. Due to scheduling
issues, we celebrated Mother's Day on Father's Day and stood our
ground with the crowd. We distracted ourselves with chatter about one
thing or another while waiting to order our food in a restaurant
without air conditioning. We served ourselves tepid water from glass
coolers, devoid of ice, in order to stay hydrated. We sat at the
children table, as all other seating was taken, and we visited
through the long wait for a delicious lunch.
The
nursery next door was the purpose for meeting at this particular
restaurant. A hot sun poured heat down over us; though melting, we
were not deterred from enjoying the plants, pots and farm animals.
Warning signs about the turkey and the cow were photo worthy. Most of
the plants were in the hot sun, but behind the farmer's house there
was a gazebo and a few trees. We slowed down to enjoy the shade
before viewing the succulents. All three of us appreciate plants, but
we have developed a fondness for succulents; they are easier to grow
here in the coastal desert. As far as I know no one before my
generation, on either side of the family, has had an affinity for
cacti. With a brother living in Arizona and the girls and I living in
the coastal dessert, succulents have grown on us so to speak.
It
was a day my grandma would have appreciated: the farm-like setting,
drawers filled with seeds to be planted in the dark soil with hopeful
anticipation and lots of plants. It's interesting to consider the
various things that run in families. Families reproduce behaviors,
beliefs, values, interests, mannerisms, genes determining health and
longevity, favorite recipes, etc. The list is endless. Their are many
things I see reflected in my girls passed down through generations of
resourceful, caring women. But on this day it was the love of growing
things that drew us back to grandma, the way she tied a straight row
with string to stakes at end each of the garden. Grandma, and others
like her, are the stakes to which we often find our passions tied.
Grandma planted vegetables to feed the family, but flowers were
scattered about for beauty; she was a practical woman housing a soft
spot for a well put together bouquet.
In
my mind there is a memory etched of grandma wearing a simple, cotton
dress and canvas slip on shoes bent over freshly turned dirt dropping
seeds in anticipation of a summer harvest. She planted, weeded,
harvested, snapped, blanched and canned. The joy she took in having
flowers is what was most pressed in my DNA. Like grandma, I love a
beautiful bouquet. She and I had so many things in common, and a day
at the nursery with my girls reminds me of how much I miss her.
After
grandma died they found two little calendars like the insurance
companies used to mail each year to clients. There were just a few
lines for noting events on any given day of the calendar. Grandma had
filled those two calendars full of the ordinary happenings of each
day: weather, gardening, visitors, births, deaths, spring cleaning,
baking, canning, the number in attendance at Bible study and when she
hung clothes on the line. I was fascinated by how well documented her
days were in such tiny spaces. I identify well with her need to keep
track of the everyday things that give life meaning like the photos
the girls and I took of our hot day at the nursery. It is interesting
how such simple things, the memories we make and value deepen our
connection to one another. Roots are deepened in the documentation of
the memories.
There
are many things I do, believe and enjoy that are linked to my
grandparents. It is hard to find a good stopping place here. But I am
left with so much fodder for future writings. That day I was blessed
to share a similar interest with my girls, one that takes me back to
hot summer days under the Elm tree snapping beans and listening to
grown-ups talk about the weather. Do you find yourself surprised by
shared interests with a relative you barely knew or one you've spent
a lot of time with over the years? I would love to hear your stories.
P.S. Laura Ashley Smith, my daughter, gets the credit for the charming turkey photo.
